On Society: Cheatville

I'm giving this entry a shot as we bid goodbye to year 2014. Let's all leave the drama that we have, most especially all the ignorance and stupidity in us together with the passing year. If you're vacuous in love or in your relationship, better start your 2015 with awareness and have an eye to the society of cheatville. Be perceptive about infidelity.

Why do people cheat?

• Passion has faded
• Partners feel lonely
• People find someone who treats them better more than their current partner
• Discontentment
• Temptations are at risk and they can't resist it
• They just want to end the relationship
• Social influence (oftentimes shown by parents)
• People cheat because they pay attention to what is missing rather than what they have

Infidelity has an adverse effects such as depression, divorce for married couple and worst, suicide and homicide

Since infidelity is a very sensitive discussion, it connotes certain related explanations. Individualism may come. Referring to genders, men are likely to commit infidelity at large than women, because men have higher testosterone which is responsible for the strong desire to have sexual intercourse which is the main course of cheating. 

Personality can be an answer too. People who are less attentive with less resistance can be a cheater too because it's their own cultured disposition. 

Lastly, having a lot of dissimilar context from the partner is more expose to infidelity, especially when the other one is competitive in terms of attainment, educational background and other factors, in short, infidelity roots from intimidation and insecurity.

Why is it hard for a human to become faithful and loyal?

Personally, I think humans are really vulnerable when it comes to cognitive process to take good care and save their relationship when on rocks. It's not really hard when your psyche is firm in terms of committing in a relationship.

In some situational cases, people who are spending time with attractive people and exposed in wider metropolitan which liberalism is a mainstream, makes the scene tempting for them to engage in deception.

If the person lied, would it make him a cheater?

 Lies pertain to cheating and cheating is betrayal. When the person is betrayed by his partner through lies, he becomes a victim of infidelity as for some people who have considered lying as a form of cheating. 

Seemingly true, cheating and lying are close to the same thing, but if you would analyze their own extremities, they have difference. 

To make myself precise and definite, I'd like to quote this: 

"You can lie without cheating, but you can't certainly cheat without lying"

(I once lied but I didn't cheat. How was that? There were certain things that I had to deny and keep just to avoid verbal fights. Cheating includes having an affair, having sex with anybody, dating other persons when you're committed, and I've committed none any of those relationship crimes. I know you'll defend the epigram about being honest even if it'd hurt them, but for some it's better to know nothing about the truth 'cause what he doesn't know won't hurt him and so as I intended, nakakagago pero totoo. I lied sa pinakamaliit na rason pero nafeel niya na nabetrayed siya. Once a lie will always be a lie, whether small or big, reasonable or of little depth, sabi niya. 

Kapag ba nagsinungaling ka, kaya mo ng mangaliwa? Hindi naman lahat ng kasinungalingan patungkol sa pambabae o panlalake. Nabasag mo yung paborito niyang cup pero magsisinungaling ka kasi natatakot kang magalit siya. Infidelity ba yun? 

Lies actually damage the relationship because trust is the main foundation of the growing relationship, but cheating is the plague that injects deep emotional pain.

How to heal from cheating?

•  Since you’re both working on change, be patient. You need time to heal from the betrayal and your partner needs time to heal from the guilt. There's always a time for everything.

• Be upfront and honest with about what hurts you, what scares you and what makes you angry. Try not to rehash old stuff repeatedly. 

• You have to let the pain in and when it hurts you, let the pain go away and from there, you'd know how to deal with it and start anew.

How to avoid cheating/being cheated?

• Appreciate your partner. Love them unconditional with the best you could give.

•  Talk about both perceptions and thoughts about infidelity because everyone defines certain things with different interpretations.

• Trust your hunches.  They're usually based on facts filed away just below conscious level according to research.

Piece of advice

• If you've been cheated, live your life well and live happy. There is nothing more vengeful but to look good and be joyful. 
• If you're going to cheat, think twice, karma will find its own way to hurt you back.
• If your partner is accusing you of cheating, he or she's actually the one who is deceitful.
• Tell truthful things even if it makes them angry
• If they are acting extra nice for no reason, they are probably cheating on you
• Cheaters are weak-minded, and insecure.

Don't enclose yourself on "once a cheater, always a cheater” because if the person is involved in a well-matched partnership, it diminishes or eliminates their desire to cheat, making them dedicated and stick-to-one, so that epigram does not have to girdle on you.

As the year strips, I'm hoping for better persons in their relationship, better in terms of being a keeper and not a destroyer, wiser and not dope.

Have a fruitful year everyone!

Now Playing: Bloodstream - Ed Sheeran
: 2 days left before 2015

: Migs Lorenzana