Sunday, January 25, 2015

Happy Talking




Being an extrovert means being affable too. Talking and expressing have become vital to me, whether sensible or none. When random things go on, you'll start having weird conversations and sarcasms if your friend's demented or the other way around. 


** My sister and I having a lunch... (chicken is the viand, that's why it's all about chickens)

Ava: hey! What's the difference between chicken and hen?
Miggy: chicken is a male chicken, while hen is a female chicken that lay eggs, or maybe, chicken is a native one, and hen is a... uhm.... a... hen?
Ava: WHAT??? what the f*ck are you talking about? Stupid!
Miggy: really? Well differentiate them.
Ava: (paused) chicken is what we are currently eating, while hen is what we see outside.
Miggy: ha!-ha!-ha! very funny, nice try kiddo!!
Ava: oh well stupid guy, what is a rooster?
Miggy: roosters do cockfight.
Ava: roosters are the nagsasabong..
Miggy: did I f*cking say that? Para kang gago!




** During our outing. Me and a girl-friend of ours grilling barbecues and hotdogs..

Friend: aaayyy! wala na! nahulog na! taenes.
Miggy: Alin?
Friend: yung hotdog!!
Miggy: wala pa namang isang minuto yan oh! Kapag nahulog ang pagkain sa lupa at wala namang sauce, quite edible pa yan. Pulutin mo na! Isa, dalawa, tatlo, pwede pa yan!
Friend: kadiri kaya, may germs na eh! kahit ba wala pang 5 segundo, mabilis kumalat ang germs no!
Miggy: De itapon mo! Jusmiyo 'tong taong 'to, pinahihirap ang buhay. Pati ba naman yan pinoproblema pa.
(all of a sudden, she's flip-flopping the hotdog back on the griller)
Miggy: oh! bakit binabalik mo sa ihawan?
Friend: sayang eh! baka mamatay yung germs pag ininit :)
Miggy: (I was like, OH F*CKING HUMAN'S PSYCH!)




** While buying fruits in a public market, with this lady vendor and a friend of mine..

Miggy: hi, goodafternoon, how much for the apple?
Vendor: eto hijo, isang piraso, sampung piso.
Miggy: no, no per kilo po (slang the po, as pow!)
Vendor: ay, ano ba 'to? Foreigner?
Friend: naku! ale sorry ho, Filipino ho yan..........
(then I looked at my friend with wide eyes, tryin' to say "ideny mo")
Friend: kaso ho lumaki sa America, kaya medyo di pa ho sanay ng Tagalog.
Vendor: ah kaya pala! mukhang Koreano ato.
Friend: may pagkasingkit ho kasi diba? saka yung syle ng buhok, at yung kulay.
(then the vendor's kids started looking at me with an observing eye)
Miggy: (controlling my laugh, pretending that I don't understand them)
Friend: salamat ho.
Miggy: thank you po (slang)
Friend: gago ka! Mapapahamak pa tayo sa ginagawa mo eh. English ka pa ha iiwan na kita! Sa palengke tagalog ka sa mall ka lang mag-foreigner.
Miggy: haha nakakatawa ka! Kabadong-kabado ka. Sarap kaya mantrip. Saka wala namang nagtataka eh.


I guess this bearing's pretty much deceiving, that's why. Haha



** Chatting to a guy friend, talking about Snooki Polizzi being killed on twitter...

Miggy: what's wrong with the twitter users? Killing someone who's actually kicking.
Alex: who?
Miggy: they killed Snooki on Twitter, on trending topics, Worldwide "RIP SNOOKI"
Alex: Snooki? Snooki Serna? yung nagblusang itim?
Miggy: Snooki Serna ka diyan! Snooki Polizzi, Snooki from the Jersey Shores. If si Serna 'to, she's surely a famous local actress for the foreign people to talk about her. Utak dre! Utak! Hahaha
Alex: Wow! Talino mo eh! Who's she?
Miggy: google her
Alex: (googling) don't recognize her at all, haha! Malaki dede, mukhang pokpok. bitch yata 'to eh.
Miggy: hahahaha! Maka lait. Nalib*gan ka naman!
Alex: Baka? Di ko trip mga mukhang sabog.




** While watching TV with my friend

Miggy: Powerpuff girls na naman pinapanood mo?
Anna: favorite ko kaya 'to. Di nakakasawa... May naiisip lang ako, Miggyboy.
Miggy: What is it?
Anna: It was reserved long time ago, kung pinapanood natin 'to ngayon, siguro dalaga na sila Blossom, Bubbles at Buttercup.
Miggy: hahaha! Kasing tanda na natin, ganun?
Anna: yuh! Like in 20's.
Miggy: I didn't know that animated characters do grow like real ones do.
Anna: who knows?





** Conversing with a Korean living around the vicinity in Paranaque

Mr. Khang: what are those girls doing with other Koreans?
Miggy: I don't know. Maybe they're dating or living together.
Mr. Khang: Aist! No! Girls here in the Philippines are butterflies
Miggy: huh? What do you mean butterflies?
Mr. Khang: Paru-paro. You know, daming lalake.
Miggy: like prostitues? No! That's not true. Don't say that. Not all are paru-paro.
Mr. Khang: kaya kami nauubos pera kasi paru-paro sila
Miggy: anak ng pucha! Head butt-in kaya kita o pa-deport sa Pilipinas?
Mr. Khang: I don't understand, baka ako mura mo na.
Miggy: never mind, I said don't generalize all. Be wiser the next time you'd get a girl.
Mr. Khang: (talking in Korean)
Miggy: langya! Ano kaya'ng pinagsasasabi nito? (May marinig lang ako'ng shi bal, gae se ki ya o ji ral ha ne, makakatikim ka din sa'kin ng Tagalog na mura.)







Now Playing: Love me like you do - Ellie Goulding
: Sunday boredom
: Migs Lorenzana





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